It's all about the friends. Remember those days? 7th and 8th grade. I actually had a girlfriend named Ginger who was known for her strength. At lunch the boys would line up and get beaten over and over in arm wrestling. Since I was likely the weakest kid in school, it worked out very well to have Ginger as my girlfriend.
We were kind of in that time when girls were becoming interesting to us but for the most part the boys were much happier with other boys and the girls were happier with other girls. We went to dances but most of the time we just stared across the room and thought about dancing, fearful of having to touch a girl. The space between was much preferred! It was all about the friends and it seemed as though being alone was unheard of and strange. Often we formed clubs (but didn't call them clubs) and secret groups, working hard to exclude certain types of people unless they did something to earn the right to be in our group. And it didn't take much to be included nor excluded for that matter.
We were growing up and trying to decide our values, our worldview, our niche, and even our own gifts. We were shy, outgoing, scared, confident, insecure, dumb, smart, rude, polite, afraid of adults, and arrogant about our superior knowledge, but wondered if we were largely stupid. We wanted to be independent as long as we were popular and accepted. We were happy to have a large group of friends but we talked about how we didn't care what others thought of us. We often used phrases like "That's just the way I am" or "I am just weird." Of course deep down we knew that tomorrow we might be different, especially since our personalities changed rapidly. Our clothes never fit, our hair was always wrong (or in my case was actually present), we knew everyone talked badly about us, and we worked hard to impress everyone while denying our own concern about ourselves. Every sentence anyone said began with I!
It was junior high and we were all confused and geeky and ironically lovable! It was all about the friends wasn't it?
Okay now I am 50 and am just now getting into Facebook. While many things about technology intrigue me and I find myself gobbling up the latest gadget and enjoying dropbox, google, kindle, iphones, ipads, itunes, cloud computing, and constantly texting, at the same time I am resistant to fads. And facebook seems a little fad-like to me. But I decided to dive in and discover the world of social networking. Lo and behold I find myself in groups, wanting more friends, talking about myself to others, keeping secrets when possible, trying to fit in with others, desperately holding onto my independent identity. Wait...is it possible? Is this junior high all over again?
Maybe so, but it sure is fun to reconnect with friends and to know what the old guys and gals are doing. Wonder what happened to Ginger? Maybe she is a mud wrestler or more likely a lawyer still beating everyone at arm wrestling. Facebook is kind of like dancing without having to (yuck) touch somebody or even having a face to face conversation. I see pictures of people (Tim has lost lots of weight and looks great!) and I find out what all they are doing. We even talk sort of and become popular while retaining our independence. It's kind of fun and a little addicting even. I sure value my privacy but I also enjoy social networking. It is the best of both worlds--popularity and independence at the same time! Plus there is no pressure to be anything or look a certain way or have a particular circle of friends. While protocol is part of the action on facebook, and there are hints of social contract expectations, a person is autonomous.
So I feel like I am in junior high all over again except without the inanity and confusion and fear and arrogance. It's kind of like we get to keep the good things and forget the bad, isn't it?Smile if you want to, you are on Facebook. After all, it's about the friends.
No comments:
Post a Comment