Not sure of the personality trait nor of the identified value system, but I have little to no need of living in the past and repeating the events that happened yesterday. Once it is done, it is over and it signals a time to move forward. Having been a part of successful artistic events throughout my career, I do not desire to replicate them nor return to a different era. This does not mean I do not miss certain things about yesterday or even 50 years ago, but I have the kind of personality that gives a nod to the past while moving forward to tomorrow.
Great performances were meaningful, special, and enriching not only to me but hopefully all present. Yet I never, ever listen to a recording of myself either performing or conducting. I do not even enjoy hearing the music I wrote again. I prefer, instead, to create something new, to lead something new, to imagine the next thing.
Not being a hoarder, when it is time to get rid of excess, I do so. Feeling no need to keep old items no longer used, I am completely comfortable throwing things away or giving things away. At times slightly sentimental, particularly involving my family, and I do recognize the events from the past shape our future, I prefer to practice an objective and creative approach to the future. As an amateur historian, I am intrigued with events of the past and how those set forth a culture that impacts us today. Yet I have no desire revisit those events other than acknowledging they did occur. When it was time to throw away my high school letter jacket, I did so. When my record collection no longer had value, I got rid of it. Objects are simply objects and have no legitimate value other than what they could mean to someone else. Thus I do struggle with my book collection, although I anticipate a day all the books will be given away.
It is not a matter of judgment of right or wrong to live in the past, it is more that I do not wish to reflect on it nor to allow it to govern my thought processing. Unfortunately, this makes me different I suspect and hard to understand. It also makes it difficult to understand others who do live in the past. As a Dean of Fine Arts, I have great respect for art music of the past, for the composers who wrote the beautiful music, and for the artist achievements that make our world today better, richer, and give it all meaning. But at the same time, it is done and I believe it is time for a new canon of literature. Beating the drum for new expressions, for human creativity, for imagination and innovation, I often find myself in a precarious position of teaching the old while championing the new.
Time to move forward, to create and to dream of the next thing. Love history but do not live in it. Respect past achievements but do not rely on them. Find joy where it is now not where it was yesterday.
