Birthday Madness

Friday, September 1 was my and my oldest son's birthday. I am now 46 years of age and he is 20. I recall the day he was born and consider it one of the best birthday presents a man could ever have. Jacob is a shining star in my life and always will be.

Yet, for many years, I have not wanted to celebrate my birthday given that it seems to me that it is just simply another day gone by. This year was a Friday and next year will be a Saturday--both man made terms to codify the 24 hour clock and 7 day week in which we reside. There is really nothing special about the day--the sun comes up, we eat, we work, we play, the sun goes down, and we sleep. Although a rather cynical view, in the end my insouciant attitude toward birthdays was often met with confutation and even disgust. I refused to be part of the madness but in my efforts to avoid it, I was the loser. For in the madness is found joy, and in the madness is hope, and in the madness is life.

The problem, I now realize, is that I was denying others the right to treat me with kindness and deference. Of course, one could argue that we should always treat people with respect and we should always attempt to honor others for to serve is the greatest gift we have been given. And yet, pragmatically speaking, it is impossible to treat every person we encounter as though it is his or her birthday. So we simply wait for that opportunity to extend warmth and kindness to someone who means something to us.

I was the recipient of the birthday madness, but aside from the once a year birthday thing to family members, I have rarely been the giver. But is it that hard to give, to acknowledge another person's special day, to revel in their happiness, and to rejoice in their life? It shouldn't be hard and in fact should be something that we anticipate.

And so I have decided to set aside my cynicism and sarcasm about birthdays and become a part of the madness. A madness that includes cards, balloons, cakes, gifts, smiles, joy, sharing, and honoring. In truth it seems that we so rarely have a special day--why not enjoy it? I might even try imagining that every person I meet tomorrow is experiencing a birthday! Maybe it will remove the selfishness that is inherent in me and help me reach out in thoughtfulness to other people.

Thank you to all my family and friends who wished me a happy birthday. You made my day special as I hope to make yours. Each of you make the world a better place through selfless acts of kindness. It is time for me to do the same.