Branded for Life

In 1846 during the Mexican War, when President Polk sent an army into Mexico to end the tyranny and stop the takeover of Santa Anna, General Winfield Scott along with officers Robert E. Lee, Thomas Jackson, Franklin Pierce, and Ullyses Grant, led troops to a difficult but resounding victory, ending the reign of Santa Anna. Like all wars, there were times of bloodshed, fear, confusion, sorrow, challenges, and moments of great elation. For all its glory (if there is glory in war), unfortunately during one of the final battles, nearly 80 soldiers deserted the army.

We are not sure why there are deserters in war. Perhaps fear of death, or maybe even abhorence of killing, maybe indifference as to the outcome, maybe a girlfriend back home, maybe a broad questioning of why there are wars, fighting, death. Apparently many of the deserters were not of American descent and had migrated from foreign countries only to find themselves in the army, fighting a war over which they had no interest in being killed or killing for some strange mysterious property rights dispute they did not understand. Whatever the reason, 80 soldiers deserted. 50 of them were hanged due to their lack of contrite behavior, their satisfaction with their decision, their own indifference. But 30 of them displayed great humility and gave lip service to their own culpability and shame for deserting. General Scott decided to spare their lives but leave them branded forever. These 30 men were branded with the letter D on their cheek to display to the world for the rest of their lives that they were deserters.

What did those 30 do for a living after leaving the army? Did they live prosperous lives, terrible lives, isolated from humanity, productive lives, lives of despair and agony? We have no record of those 30 and it would only be conjecture to imagine their lives as branded deserters. Maybe they would have preferred death over permanent label or maybe it didn't matter all that much to them? Maybe the physical mark has no bearing on the character inside and nothing changed about the branded people. Since there is little to gain from this type of hypothetical theorizing, let's spend a moment of self-reflection.

What would your brand be if you had one? Is a tattoo a type of brand, a sign displayed for everyone to see? In some ways, are we all branded by our appearance? Tall, short, bald, blonde, glasses, beard, eye color, and the list continues. We carry with us a mark of some kind everywhere we go. It may not be a big "D" on the cheek, but it is something, and that something somehow, perhaps wrongly, represents something of ourselves to others.

For the Christian, we cannot nor should we brand a big "C" on our cheek for all to see, yet in my mind we should try to carry our faith with us everywhere we go. Not in an overt, offensive manner but rather in a comfortable display of who we are. That brand may be a smile, a sparkle, a joy, or a look of confidence, or contentment, or compassion, perhaps even courage. There are many ways to demonstrate the love of God in our lives. As the hymn says, maybe it is time to "Let Others See Jesus in You."

Keys, winds, and strings

Many years ago a good friend of mine who is a very fine euphonium player and currently director of bands at a University in North Carolina mentioned that brass and woodwinds sound better playing in keys with flats. I asked him why he believed that and he reminded me that most instruments are built in flat keys.

For all its complexity and nearly unlimited combination of sounds, music--at least in our American world, given that other nationalities have a broader scale--is comprised of 12 tones before beginning to repeat itself. Because of the natural harmonic series, something that still gives me pause as I reflect on its remarkable properties, after 12 chromatic tones, the pitches sound the same except higher or lower. This is way we have a low A that sounds quite similar to a high A. The lower pitches use a slower vibration rate than the high pitches. When the vibrations double, the pitch sounds an octave higher. Although our system of 12 chromatic pitches has flaws and does not tell the full musical story, it is a fairly established system and gives us the variety of sound we generally require.

Music does not have to be in one particular key or another but most people seem to prefer what we call tonality in music, that is sound with a diatonic foundation to it. Composers and performers often branch out beyond a certain key and alter music chromatically to give it more variety and interest, but in the tonal world of music, they will gravitate to one key by the end of the song or piece. If all music were in the same key all the time, our ears would become desensitized to the same basic sound and we would likely lose interest in music. Being that boredom is the steroid of creativity, we enjoy hearing a variety of keys in music.

Back to woodwinds and brass sounding better in flat keys. I believe it is true. Instruments have the ability to play all the chromatic notes and great players can play comfortably in any key, but because woodwinds and brass are built at the factory in flat keys, the open sounds of these instruments provide more resonance than do sharp keys. Yet the converse is true for string instruments. They are built with open sounds that support sharp keys. This is why bands often play in flat keys and strings often play in sharp keys. The danger comes in the problem of all bands sounding similar due to their predictable usage of keys and all string music sounding similar for the same reason.

Now the issue comes when we mix the two. Excellent composers striving for musical variety yet still getting the best out of the musicians often insist on demanding performance that encompasses all keys and all notes available. This makes great music both challenging and musically satisfying. In the case of My Fair Lady, when we are in flat keys, the predominantly woodwind and brass sound is solid, full, comfortable to the ear. When we jump into sharp keys, the instrumentalists who are all professionals, do not sound quite as resonant, once again confirming the theory that winds and brass sound better in flat keys.

But as all great art must have tension, so too is music reliant on tension and repose. Thus this great musical, My Fair Lady, is strong due to its vast expression of sound of various keys. I applaud the composer and the arranger who put the music together. Now it is our responsibility to perform the music to the best of our ability regardless of the keys or the technical challenges demanded.

But bands need to beware of the problem of putting on the same clothes day in and day out over years. Eventually the clothes wear out and appear dull. So too is the use of the same few keys in band music. Thank goodness for aural variety as presented by great music. Strings have helped avoid the trappings of musical boredom.

My Fair Lady

Once again this summer I am directing a musical. It is difficult, long, demanding, stressful, and I absolutely love it! I now have several musicals under my repertoire belt and feel confident I could direct almost any show now. The years have allowed me to direct Fiddler on the Roof, Annie, Sound of Music, Oklahoma, Music Man, parts of Camelot, and Cinderella not to mention several operas. It has all been fun, educational, enriching, hard work, and at times deeply meaningful. It is a heavy responsibility to determine the right kind of orchestra and the personnel for the orchestra. Some shows need more strings--a tall order in our area--whereas other shows need more winds and rhythm. Some shows require woodwinds to double on saxophones but others need a more "classical" woodwind approach. Brass players usually need to be well-rounded players who can play a little jazz, show style, and classical style.

Forming the orchestra depends on the show as well as the available personnel but somehow each year it all comes together. Normally I suspect a town the size of Brownwood would be challenged to do a full-length musical, but in Brownwood the talent is deep. We hear great players, great singers, and impressive acting. The sets are lavish, efficient, and completely appropriate to the show. Lighting and sound, always challenging, are nevertheless done well. This year the My Fair Lady production is amazing. A well-crafted, classy show with lavish costumes, fastidious and accurate sets, and acting demands that would challenge professionals. On top of that, the music is wonderful and difficult, requiring full range and styles. The orchestra is asked to play under the singers but maintain the stylistic demands of the score.

Aside from some lengthy dialog and emotional ambiguity of the story line, My Fair Lady zings along at a fast pace with a myriad of great songs and serious moments balanced by hilarity. Tender love songs are juxtaposed with energetic happy songs only to be interrupted by yet another song of anger or concern. All comes together to form one of the great musicals of the 20th century. I am blessed to be the conductor of the orchestra and blessed to be part of this terrific show.

A little righteous irritation

Getting up early Saturday morning, going for a fairly short run, and deciding to take care of a few things, I jumped in the truck and headed for town. But my jaunt ended up irritating me with several of my pet peeves about the modern world. Stopping at McDonalds, and I must apologize to my brother who is a big McDonald's fan due to the quick but consistently cheap and flavorful food, I ordered a yogurt parfait and a sausage biscuit and a small orange juice. It was a small order and I paid cash for the food, receiving a little change in the change tray, and was handed the blasted receipt. I didn't want the receipt. I hate receipts. Just a stupid piece of paper that ends up crumpled in the trash. Granted it had my order number on it which the cashier had stated, but I memorized that number quickly and had not need for the receipt. I suppose that were I on a business trip, I might need it for tax purposes or record keeping, but a quick glance around revealed that everyone in the restaurant threw the stupid waste of time receipt in the trash.

I know the cashiers are taught to give receipts to everyone and often we see a sign that says something to the effect of "If we fail to issue you a receipt, your meal will be free," but to me this is a huge waste of paper and time and energy. I really would like the choice to ask that I not be given a receipt. In fact, the next time I order something I am going to state, "No receipt" just to see what happens.

But I got over that moment of irritation and sat down to eat my food. The orange juice was very good which surprised me considering how lame was the sausage biscuit. It tasted and felt like some sort of rubberized piece of vinyl sandwiched by thin plastic flakes disguised as bread. The yogurt had some good fruit in it but lacked the zing of good yogurt and seemed mostly like instant milk developed from powder. I must admit to being a little bit of a food snob these days and prefer organic tasting food not overly preserved. Still, I am the one who chose to stop there and eat the inexpensive, though rather generic food. My choice for sure, and I will probably do so again, and I will probably keep complaining about it!

My last errand of the morning took me to the drug store for some necessary items. I didn't get much but as I was checking out, the inevitable question arose, "Do you have your plus card?" I quickly and a little emphatically said no. The friendly cashier said, "Would you like one, it is free?" I again said no. I finished paying and left. But I am sick and tired of the stupid card thing. Some stores give you a "discount" for the products by presenting your card. Other stores allow for the "earning of points" which supposedly will give you free stuff later. Other places simply issue a set of coupons for other items in the store. But the truth is that the card is a tracking device. It monitors and records your purchases in order to provide the kind of products customers are seeking as well as to find a way to get you back in the store using appropriate coupons to your needs. Now all that sounds innocuous until you realize they are actually spying on you. It erodes your freedom and categorizes you in a funny sort of way. You become a thing, a consumer, a spender of money and they are going to use this great card to help you spend more money.

Okay, enough ranting. My irritations are not unusual and I have contributed to them by frequenting those establishments. But I also have a right to complain about it and a right to find other places to spend my money.

Years of students

Partly due to facebook and partly due to getting older, many of my former students have been getting in touch with me and saying hello. Some are in music, some are not. Many are now parents and meeting the obligations of families, paying bills, working, and being productive citizens. Some have remained single. All this to say they simply became people! Yes, of course they were people before, but in my role as a teacher, my responsiblity was to teach them the subject matter at hand, whether that be horn, band, conducting, composition, etc. But maybe, just maybe in the process of teaching the subject, we also learned about each other and learned how to be better musicians, to be better people, to be productive, successful, disciplined, organized, and compassionate.

And there is no doubt that I learned more and continue to learn more from my students than I have taught them. From my students I learned to find joy in others' success, to be sensitive, to understand, to see the world broadly, to respect all kinds of people, and to embrace our commonality as well as our differences. When I think back on Steven, Laurence, Kevin, John, and many others from the Louisiana days, I am hoping they are doing well. Great people and very focused on success. I also remember a talented young man named Chris and another talented young lady named Kristine. Both students of mine back in the 80s.

Then onward to Stanton, Texas where I became a band director and taught all the instruments. Along the way, I kept teaching horn and had several successful students such as Sally, Laurie, Misty, and Stephanie. Laura and Sande were great too not to mention the countless band students I taught such as Matt, Kenneth, Dustin, and Stacy. Amy came over from another school for lessons and occasionally there were drop-ins looking for a teacher. Those were some outstanding years of working with wonderful students. Kacie, Belinda, Matt, Jan, Jason, and Brandie were just a few of the wonderful students from those years.

Then my years at Howard Payne as horn teacher and band director where Kenneth grew to be one of the stars and is now a successful conductor. And of course Sally, Sam, Lydia, Alex, Kailey, Taylor, James, Crissy, Misty, Emily, Mary, and for a brief time Jeff, all great talents. In some ways Cara ended up being the top player since she now plays in the New York Philharmonic. Now a couple of bright high school students come to take lessons and I certainly expect great things from Cody and Karley!

Can't ignore all the band directors, elementary music teachers, choir directors, orchestra directors, pianists, and music ministers who were in my classes and who are now teaching and influencing countless lives. Preston is amazing and deserves accolades for his incredible teaching skills. But I am just as proud of Pedro, Rob, Shannon, Liz, Becky, John and Scot and Jason, Riley, Joe, and Michelle. Lacey was an awesome teacher and I suppose I can a thread of credit for Olivia's success.

But truthfully while my students mean everything to me, my success as a teacher is due to my own teachers, parents, and all those who helped me along the way. The list of teachers who made a difference in my life is lengthy including Kirke McKenzie, John Faraone, Mike Hatfield, Lawson Hager, Loyd Hawthorne, Lowell Greer, Orlando Calderon, Celeste Myall, Bill Woods, Dan McAlexander, Tom Lott, and of course my parents. Really this list could go on and on naming the many influences in my life. And I would suspect each person mentioned could mention several dozen teachers who influenced them. No teacher operates in a vacuum or on an island and the world remains interconnected through generations, history, and the future.

I give thanks to my teachers and I give thanks to my students. We have shaped each other and grown in the process. Sure there were challenges along the way but it was all worth the effort as we work together making a difference in lives.

Church, good grief

It was with interest I read about the ousting of famed pastor Robert Schuller from the board. Having created a religious empire of sorts in California with a theology of trusting in the Lord, finding the good in all people, and demonstrating self-worth through positive thinking and lots of smiles, Schuller and his son are no longer a part of their original church. Schuller's daughters made some dramatic changes to the church, resulting in a drop in attendance, a decline in giving, and creditors calling for payback. Dependent on giving by members, if the people are not happy, the giving disappears. This is always true.

What went wrong? Was it a unique problem to that church? Or is it simply another manifestation of the two major issues facing the church today? I can sum up most problems with two words--style and inclusion (my analytical son will likely point out that I used three words!). According to the news article, Daddy Schuller practiced a form of worship in the old traditional model of hymns with an organ but daughters Schuller wanted something more contemporary and current. Daddy Schuller accepted all people in the church regardless of their sinful practices. Daughters Schuller wanted to exclude homosexuals based on Biblical principles. Style and Inclusion.

And the church divided on these issues, resulting in irreconcilable differences. Who was right? Which camp was the correct one? Maybe both are right and both are wrong. Or maybe there is no right or wrong, maybe just opinions and preferences. Maybe it essential to establish our personal standards, dig in our heels, and never sway from our perceived self-excellence. Or maybe we should have no standards of excellence and accept everything and anything in church? On the spectrum of total tolerance versus rigid behavioral expectations, what is the Christian approach? Or as Francis Schaeffer asks, "How should we then live?"

I adopt a personal standard that is based on my upbringing, my worldview, my own spiritual journey, and application of the Word. Yet I also seek truth and wisdom from many other sources, drawing from an eclectic mix of nationalities, religions, and practices. I contend that in some form or another, all of us do this very thing. We are products of our DNA and our environment, and our life experiences shape us and alter us over time. That said, while I do not subscribe to nor embrace homosexuality, I conversely do not disdane those who do. Other than believing it is not the preferred sexual approach and being aware of the Scriptural principal against homosexuality, at the same time I will never disallow nor condemn a practicing homosexual's right to live and worship in the way he or she sees fit. I am against it in philosophy and practice for myself, but also respect the rights of people to be who they wish to be as long as my own rights are not violated. Furthermore I posture that the church is the place for everyone and to exclude those not like ourselves is to create a small-minded, narrow theatrical facade with no more purpose than to be a kind of prison of like people. I am not interested in that church.

Regarding worship styles, I believe I am consistent in my views. Preferring an organ led hymn-based service, I have learned to enjoy and yes worship to other kinds of music. I am glad that people enjoy other kinds of music and remain convinced that it is our right to like what we like and to worship the way we want to worship. As a musician, I do tend to be rather opinionated about music and have great respect for those hymns with quality text and interesting music. And I do believe that the finest hymns are superior to the finest contemporary choruses, at least in terms of musical complexity and theological depth. But the poor hymns, and I recognize this is a subjective statement, are of little value, causing a higher regard for most modern choruses. In the end, regardless of one's opinion or preference, it belies a loving, tolerant practice to end a church over preference and over the inability to find common ground in worship styles.

It pains me to hear of a major church split or the closing of a church over these two issues, both of which are minor in the broad perspective of worshiping God. Church may indeed be frustrating and we will never agree on everything, but we can learn to tolerate our differences and turn the grief into good. It is worth holding onto the institution of the church. Each Sunday you may stand beside a homosexual or a radical contemporary or someone not like yourself, but I urge you to stay standing and remain firm to yourself while accepting others.

Marvelous Medema

Driving to Abilene to hear the Ken Medema concert, I shared with the family my memories of Ken Medema in the 1970s. Having heard him several times while a teenager growing up in El Paso, I am convinced his music has made a profound impact on my own music and in some broad sense an impact on my life. Arriving 30 minutes early to the concert, we sat near the front so as to see the keys on the piano.

He arrived on stage at 7:00, sat down at the piano and began to play a medium paced funk-style song called "Texas Fourth of July." It was a fun little song intended to reach the audience of over a thousand people. He then moved into a furiously roiling mass of rhythmic and harmonic joy that served as an accompaniment to Brethren We Have Met to Worship. Covering the keyboard and shifting quickly and well in and out of tonality and altered chords, the piece was almost inhumanly performed by the singer/song-writer. With mind-boggling technqiue, creative harmonic development, and incredible rhythmic energy, Ken Medema never let up with displaying his remarkable musical gifts.

One great song after another and throughout each one Ken Medema dazzled the energized audience with his stunning prowess. An average but versatile singer, his voice is powerful but a little strident at times. But his music and his performance is not about a pretty voice, it instead is about the text, the creativity, the energy, and the rhythmic power of the entire experience. In the middle of the concert, Ken has audience members tell him a story and he then creates a song about the story. One story involved attending a baseball game when the fog moved in and the balls moved in and out of the fog. Following the game was a fireworks display through the fog. Ken's song creatively explored the relationship of baseballs and fireworks in the fog and how our lives sometimes seem to reside in the fog until the light shines forth. It was a gorgeous song and not easily forgotten.

He ended the concert with a new version of his I See America, a delicious treat of musical experimentation that enhanced the meaningful text. This marvelous song was followed by a fun African song called Ubuntu where we sang and danced. I was sorry the concert ended and could have started it again. He remains the king of improvisation and Christian concerts and I am blessed to have the opportunity to hear this amazingly gifted musician.

Odds and Ends

Got up early and ran four miles this morning, but now am hurting some in the joints and muscles. It is that good kind of feeling of being sore but kind of physically productive at the same time. Running is liberating in many ways, outdoors, windy, primitive yet personal, and difficult without too much undue suffering. Yet, a physician mentioned this morning that running will inevitably harm the knees from the constant pounding. Makes me hesitate a little. Perhaps a few more years of this pounding and the knees will be okay. We'll see.

The church service was essentially patriotic this morning including Battle Hymn, National Anthem, Onward Christian Soldiers, and My Country Tis of Thee. The preacher spoke on our Christian and civic responsibility to society and to God, demonstrating through scripture God's reminders of our role as Christians. It all makes sense as we honor our country while giving thanks for the freedoms we enjoy. So why am I a little suspicious that we missed something today? Maybe it is my broad concern and question about people, believers, living in countries other than our own. It seems to be both arrogant and selfish to assume that we have it right, that our history did it all the right way, and we are doing everything correctly at the exclusion of other nationalities.

This is not to criticize our inherent patriotism, an essential ingredient in developing and maintaining national pride and dedication to democracy, but it is to question some of our assumptions that a militant Christianity is necessary for enjoying the privileges of living the way we do. It remains my contention that scripture, that all of Christianity, perhaps even all our lives, are about the Love of God and its working in the world. With love at the forefront, it makes war seem less ordained than previously suspected. Perhaps necessary at times but certainly not preferred, war and militance should never replace love and forgiveness--collectively or individually. With this conclusion, I find myself uncomfortable expending great energy singing about war regardless of its results. That said, I can never get enough study of American history and do indeed consider myself fortunate to live in this great land.

Reading Jeff Shaara's historical novel on the Mexican War. My namesake Robert E. Lee was an amazingly courageous and wise leader. But once again I am disappointed to learn how politics and political leaders often make decisions that hurt the individuals without any kind of help to the greater good. This is true regardless of which side of any war one studies.

Bored with discussions of the weather and wishing people could find more common ground in conversation than current climate conditions, it is true that the hot, extremely dry weather is contributing to our economic woes in this part of the world. The dangers of fires, the depleting drinking water, and the unplanted crops are playing havoc with our daily lives as well as the future. No matter how much technology improves our lives, without water we are nothing. Scary thought.

Proud of my son Jordan. He composed a beautiful piece for band called The Spirit Descending. It can be heard on youtube. A quick search for Jordan Tucker and The Spirit Descending will reveal a nice recording of the piece played by the top band at Howard Payne's Band Leadership Camp. Jordan is a remarkable talent with a bright future as a composer. It may be a tough road to "make it" but he certainly is capable.

Enough rambling for today. About to go hear Ken Medema who is giving a concert in Abilene. Wonderful pianist and vastly creative. Should be great!

Thoughts on Classical Music

Running a few miles this morning and listening to music through my headphones, with the shuffle setting on my ipod, I realized that I was working harder to listen when the classical music was being played. Let me digress for a minute as I pontificate about the term classical. In most ways I do not like this term and prefer art music or cultured music or cultivated or academic music but as I write those various terms, I found myself in personal disagreement since each term feels somewhat exclusionary. My dream, naive as it may be, is to embrace the totality of music with its myriad styles, instrumentation, background, and variety. But realistically that dream defies the idea of creating categories and labels. Are we a society of labeling and compartmentalization? Absolutely, but this is another subject for another day.

And so I return once again to the term classical knowing the fundamental flaws of the term. Classical music has a small but appreciative audience these days. I contend that some of the problem is related to our constant mobility and sound byte mentality. We love music as a society and can hear virtually anything at a moment's notice. We may only have 3-5 minutes to hear something or we might prefer sound while doing another activity. Classical music by its nature demands concentrated listening and a quiet environment. It tends to be sensitive, complicated, emotional, dramatic, and unpredictable. Classical music is also primarily acoustic, meaning that live instruments, real humans, have generated the sounds being heard. A great sound space with ideal acoustics allows for real human experience that is not electronically delivered.

Back to running. So I am listening to my iPod which is an app on my iPhone while pounding the pavement with my feet. It is sort of a fun adventure to hear the next selection since I have no idea what that will be. It could be a Michael Jackson song or a Stravinsky ballet or a part of a film score by Lalo Schifrin or a cowboy song by Michael Martin Murphey. Or it could be a Rachmaninoff symphony or a Claude Bolling jazz piece. Or a beautiful piano treatment of a Michel Legrand piece. The player "shuffles" around giving me something from my listening library. All great fun.

But in truth, as much as I love Stravinsky, Rachmaninoff, Corigliano, and Brahms, I have a difficult time enjoying their music while running. It is too expressive with too great a dynamic range. I strain to hear the softs and dread hearing the louds. I suddenly start worrying about the volume and cannot enjoy the music from constantly adjusting it. Plus my love of the sounds of Corigliano is without realization due to my huffing and puffing while running. Classical music does not work for every situation. Its power and expression, its complexity, its demands are not suited for driving, running, outdoor events, even social engagements are questionable. Our mobile world demands sound that is balanced, pulsated, electronically generated, and all one dynamic. Our lives ask for selections that are about 3 minutes--more than that does not fit our lifestyle. Classical music is losing the battle due its very nature!

I hit the pavement for a run and hope that I don't hear Rachmaninoff this time. I run better to Michael Jackson with its rock beat and driving rhythms. I must apologize to classical music--you are better for another day and time.

Some more economic concerns

Reading an article on the demise of several commonplace items, I remain concerned about the economy, particularly as related to the long-term future. Things are changing and much of it relates to the burgeoning usage of technology and its far-ranging benefits. Some of it also relates to people and how society will respond to various opportunities. Know that I am generally optimistic about the future, confident that initiative, ingenuity, and creativity will correct the growing economic concerns. Yet for the short haul, the economic challenges are likely to continue. What follows may seem trivial in some ways until we think of the mass globalization of the products and the changes thereto.

Television sets. We are nearing the point when episodes, concerts, and unlimited movies are available on tablet computers, internet resources, cell phones, and virtually any electronic device with access to the net. The result of this kind of instant entertainment may likely be similar to holding a book or keeping a wallet with you at at all times. This may devalue those wonderful moments of group movie watching family get togethers for television show, but with projection and a computer, and with all movies and shows available with a click or two, the idea of a television set is mobile. Anywhere, anytime. There may be a day when the television is a horse and buggy.

Watches. Sitting in the waiting room at the oil change place, I glanced at cell phone to check the time. A man I did not know began to chuckle and mentioned that he quit wearing his watch several months earlier due to looking at his phone for the time. Without realizing it, I was doing the same thing. I came home, took off my nice watch, placed it in the drawer, and have not worn it since. My watch is my phone. No longer concerned with finding my watch in the mornings, awkwardly putting it around my wrist, and worrying about it catching on something in the day, I now do not need it. Watch sells are plummeting and people are beginning to recognize they do not need a watch. Obviously some still prefer a watch on the wrist, and many treat a watch as a form of a decoration such as a necklace or a ring. But the future for watches is dismal, being replaced by mobile technology.

Wallets. This one is still out of my reach since I use my wallet for so much including carrying cash, pictures, credit cards, gift cards, drivers license, and various discount cards. But with a cash free world right around the corner, and with scanning systems that rival real physical cards, there is no doubt that the future of the wallet is at stake. Most, if not all cards, can be be on a cell phone and there is no need for real-time swiping with accuracte access codes. Pictures and licenses can all be on a cell phone not to mention codes and apps for almost anything needed.

If we then consider the factories, the workers, the multitude of tasks required to make the three products mentioned, and we add in packaging, delivery, shelf space, repairmen, parts, time spent, we suddenly realize the dramatic economic change that technology is exacting on the world. It all takes its toll on labor, on supply and demand, and ultimately the economy.

A word about Judas--Lady Gaga

Listening again to Judas by Lady Gaga, I have decided to express myself a little about this song and the video. At this point, most of my friends will probably give up on me and wonder if I have lost my head this time. Why in the world would I take any time at all to discuss something like this video?

For one thing, I think we in the classical world, working hard to help future musicians, cannot ignore nor should we ignore mass popular appeal. We need to address, consider it, reject it if necessary, embrace it at times, and mostly exam it. We also need to wrestle with several concepts that popular music presents, especially the overall sound, style, and texts. Do we need to spend all our time analyzing this music and discussing why it is popular among youth? Likely not. There are too many things to learn in the musical world and residing on one song or one type of music is educationally weak. Yet here is my analytical side coming through as I struggle to understand the appeal of this song. Mostly I have to wonder if this song is "good" for society? Bad for society? Or simply another song with little lasting value?

Lady Gaga is a fine singer with an diverse voice, full range, and lots of vocal energy. She sings with a slight reedy quality that is engaging and has a bluesy approach that is captivating. Her lows and highs are well-balanced and her hint of an unusual accent gives her a personal connection--almost as though she is communicating to individuals in a small setting. Her voice is pleasant and likeable.

She is also a fine song-writer with interesting ideas, nice melodies, rhythmic pulse, and harmonies that while a little predictable are several notches above most popular music heard on the radio today. I really enjoy the opening chorus idea, moving into the verse later. I also enjoy the moment of note repetition that then soars to a singable melody. She has an innate understanding of melody, of when to sustain and when to move quickly. Her band is terrific and aside from the non-stop pounding of the beat and the roar of guitars (both things that bore me after a few minutes), they seem to work well together and serve the best of the music. Overall Lady Gaga is a good musician, maybe not on the par with Stevie Wonder or even Elton John but maybe getting there someday.

As a dancer, she is average and a little awkward. Michael Jackson was amazing for sure. Lady Gaga is not. She almost looks uncomfortable dancing and gyrating about on stage and she struggles to keep her motions in sync with the others and with the music. Somewhat leggy and gangly, she is much more comfortable behind a piano where her fingers do the dancing. More on this later.

The stage antics. These are overall okay, sort of creative at times with funny costumes (remember Cher and Elton John!), eggs, fire, risers, face paint, all designed to get your attention. None of it appeals to me, but I suppose in our visual world, most successful performers need a visual gimic. I wonder if she comes up with this stuff or if her managers sit around trying to think of the next crazed look. Not sure. Her presentation is highly energized, creative, and a little unique at this time demonstrating that she is not inhibited at all and holds back very little in her concerts. This again gives her a connection to everyone present as though she is willing to share her musicianship with all the individuals in the room.

Now as far as the song Judas goes, I think it is an okay song. It sounds to me like a sidewise version of Bad Romance, the same structure, same minor chorus, the same guttural sounds of roaring and uhhhing. The catchy phrases are similar and it is easy to dictate on paper the melodies being sung. It is a fun, energetic song that interests me a little for its musical content. The words are another matter. What do they mean? Is this offensive to a Christian? At first I thought so, but further examination and I am not so sure. They seem nonsensical to me, so I am not sure what the purpose is? Are we supposed to laud and respect Judas for his betrayal of our Lord? Or are we saying he is a demon and we should filter out demons in our lives? I honestly cannot tell what any of this means. Because of that, I have decided not to be offended, but to remain confused!

I would prefer Lady Gaga not try to mix religious icons in her performances (of course, she does so to push the envelope and get attention), but I suppose that for me I just simply do not take her presentation very seriously. I like her voice and like parts of her music, but am somewhat indifferent to the other things.

If you are now curious, simply go to Youtube and search for Lady Gaga Judas and you will find several videos.

What I look forward to is the day she stops the junk on the stage, goes to the piano and begins to sing the old ballads from the 40s-70s! That is when we will hear the magic in her voice.

Economy, Sports, Exercise

Those Mavericks were really something the other night, winning the championship and once again surging in the 4th quarter. Not an obsessed fan, but nevertheless always enjoying a good game, I was glued to the set and responded emotionally to every play. Great game for sure. And I love to see an exciting sports game of almost any kind. Good athletes are artists in a way with their ability to jump, shoot, run, move quickly, react, hit, throw--always impressive.

The economy is confusing me right now. Just read about the housing bust taking place in our country with values dropping almost daily and foreclosures at a high level. Visited with several unemployed people yesterday going about town hoping for nearly any job that is available. Unemployment is frightening on several levels as they seek to put food on the table, pay the rent, support themselves and their spouses in some instances.

Father's Day is coming up and I just read about the exhorbitant spending for iPads and accessories. The iGrill app is $99 and is selling rampantly right now, not to mention all the little stands and additions for the iPad. Plus most iPads are over $500 and supposedly 12 million have been sold the last couple of years. Hmmm...how does this demonstrate a struggling economy? On the other hand, I do love my iPad.

Took a break for a few minutes and ran a mile in 9 1/4 minutes. Now to me I felt as though I were sprinting the whole time, but to a real runner or an athlete my time is laughable especially considering how many run miles in under 5 minutes these days. Yesterday I ran a slow 3 miles but today I went for speed over distance and it felt good. Tomorrow will be another 3 mile run. My days of football playing are long over (okay, they never really started!) and my basketball game is pretty weak and clumsy. But I like to stay in shape and believe that life sports and exercise are valuable. Truthfully I don't enjoy exercising very much, huffing and puffing, muscles aching, losing time to read or write or practice, but I suppose it is all good for me. As a friend told me once--after a workout, you feel like you took a happy pill!

With the awful economy and unemployment and housing foreclosures and people struggling everywhere, how do we as a society justify the vast amount of money spent on professional and collegiate sports, for that matter even high school sports? I just read where collegiate spending has increased and we all hear about college head coaches making salaries beyond most Presidents. Add to this the stadiums, the trips, the meals, the uniforms, the facilities, and we see spending that is mind-boggling. A recent trip to experience a commencement at a large state school reminded me of the millions spent on upgrading the stadium, which is absolutely stunning in all respects.

Again, let me reiterate how much I love a good game and do not begrudge the success of others or the success of any discipline. As a believer in the free market system of supply and demand, I must conclude that sports is in high demand at all levels thereby resulting in a great supply. As long as we as a society are willing to pay to see a game, there will always be a game to see. As long as we encourage, support, and believe in sports, there will be money poured into it. If people are willing to spend over a thousand dollars to sit in a parking lot and watch a football game on the screen, a game taking place in the nearby stadium, there will be sports.

Yes, I enjoy it, maybe not enough to spend that much money to sit in a parking lot, but certainly enough to be a fan and spend some money for the entertainment of organized sports. Yes, I do keep up with the great players and love hearing statistics, those Reds are going to have a good season if they keep up the pitching. Colleges and Universities have gained greatly from the spirit and energy of their sports teams, a concept that somehow unifies and defines colleges throughout the country. Yet, I have to wonder a little at the excesses I see, and I have to wonder a little if it is bubble about to burst?

What if our energies, our money, our fun were spent on life health, on education, on relationships, on families, on the arts, or on pursuing Godly matters? How would these and more affect our economy, our culture, our world?

Keep the great teams playing, keep the athletes moving, keep the entertainment of sports, but as Aristotle once said, "Moderation in all things."

Just a few thoughts today

Having returned from Ruidoso, New Mexico where the family visited to watch my Aunt get married, I am once again thinking about the complexity and joys of the musical world. A friend recently played an all Brahms concert with an orchestra where he experienced the Brahms Serenade in D, a movement of Brahms Symphony No. 4, and parts of the German Requiem. All great music and worth hearing for sure. I am encouraged that a community gathering wanted to hear music by the great master rather than relying on all popular music to reach the masses.

Sometimes I think we are too quick to find music that casts a wide net of influence and pleasure for people. It is nice to program great music that has withstood the test of time and is considered some of finest music written. So kudos to the community that supported the recent Brahms concert. May others continue to do the same. Keep Brahms alive!

But at the same time, whatever music was selected, I am glad that live music is still regarded for its emotional power and content. While we know that art music tends to reach an older audience, and that appreciation for it comes over time, it is mainly comforting to know that audiences will support the arts even if those occurrences are fairly rare. There are magnificent musicians working daily to hone their craft in order to have the opportunity to perform at a high level. Without those opportunities, the musicians will have no outlet and more importantly no economic support for their chosen profession.

But herein lies the dilemma: supply and demand will determine the course for the arts in the future and we must remain sensitive to this fact. The audience for classical art music is very small and the more trained musicians alienate themselves from popular music, the smaller the audience will be. It is time to draw eclectically from the vast array of music and present a mosaic of musical colors to the audiences of today. That may include a Brahms concert or it could include a Bach organ concert or Mozart or Beethoven. But it also may be some Stevie Wonder or Lady Gaga or Broadway musicals or Eric Clapton. All of it is worth exploring. Let's don't lose the Brahms, but let's also don't lose the audience.

Speaking of Lady Gaga, I am a fan. Taking away the antics, the trickery, the questionable moral fiber, the latest fad, the visual excesses, and you have a fine musician. She has a wonderful blues, velvety voice with great range and communication, interesting melodic lines, high energy, and intriguing harmonic motion in her music. I anticipate the day when she gives up on the crazed presentation and simply becomes a piano playing singer. She is really outstanding and will one day be a fine song interpreter of her own music as well as others.

New Mexico was nice but very dry and hot. Ruidoso feels generally dusty without the magic I once remembered from my childhood. A little rain would refresh that land, giving it the charm it had many years ago. For now though the people seem nervous about fires and the lack of water. But we still had a nice time with the family. Lots of good food, fun games, reading, and just being together. My aunt got married in a brief but very nice ceremony where she looked beautiful and glowed with joy. It was also great to see my very successful cousin at this celebration event. He exudes confidence and contentment in his demeanor and totally at ease with himself. Great guy in all respects.

Finished two books recently and nearing a third completion. Wrote two reviews and about to start a third one. Meanwhile I am working on a new piece of music, getting ready to play a horn concerto, continuing some research in African-American music, and trying to reorganize my book I am writing. Lots to do these days.

Horn Shopping

Went horn shopping today at Houghton Horns in Ft. Worth/Keller area. Took youngest son Jordan and student from Eastland Karley Simmons. They both ended up with nice horns after a day of trying various instruments and two happy horn players are now home practicing!

I enjoyed the day immensely, even got in a little bit of book shopping and completed my collection of Jeff Shaara books, and was treated to an opportunity to play several different horns. Each horn is slightly different in terms of shape, design, style, sound, tuning, and yes price. I love the warmth of the Alexander but am intrigued with the power of the Conn 3D. I can sense the sparkle of a Yamaha and revel in the precision of a Hoyer. All great horns for sure. But then the magic arrived.

The owner brought out a small Alexander horn that looked quite old and somehow different. He then held it out to me and said it was once owned by Dennis Brain. My eyes bugged out and my hands suddenly felt sweaty and awkward as I looked upon an instrument once touched by a master. Dennis Brain died in a tragic auto accident exactly 3 years before I was born. He was a marvel of horn playing with a beauty of phrasing, accuracy, charm, and technique rarely equaled even by today's standards. A lighter style of playing, Dennis Brain approached horn playing with ease and joy, as though the horn world were completely at his fingertips, commanding each note and each nuance with total confidence.

I informed the owner that I was not worthy to touch the instrument and he smiled and said that's what he said as well. Finally in abject humility I held the horn and began to play it. Nice instrument, very responsive and fun. Sort of playful in feel and instant joy. Like a happy, barking puppy ready to play! I loved the instrument and spent some time reflecting on the incredibly fantastic but short career of the master horn artist Dennis Brain. His Mozart Horn Concerto recording remains one of my favorite recordings of all time.

My own playing is a little weak right now, having not practiced enough lately. But I can hold my own when in shape. I heartily enjoy playing my horn and receive great satisfaction in playing, a kind of security blanket of happiness that musicians can appreciate. When I pick up a horn, particularly my own Alexander, I feel very much at home with my old friend and am ready to make music. In spite of my eclectic career that is now more or less administrative, I plan to be a horn player until the end, if for no other reason than it is great fun.

Back to horn shopping. We had a good day at the shop and it made me miss my horn obsessed days. It can really get in your blood. The owner of the shop was very helpful, quite knowledgable, and generously patient with us as we played horns. I am smiling when I think about the moment I cranked up the volume and heard the dog whine! Mostly I'm happy Jordan and Karley ended up with some good horns. Kudos to all the horn players in the world that keep this great instrument alive!

Books and Life

Reading seven different books right now and alternating between them. This is a form of Attention Deficit Disorder caused by the some kind of inherent weakness, the tendency to jack rabbit between projects and avoid completion. Yet it is kind of fun and each book meets some kind of niche for reading. Fiction and non-fiction, old and new, it's all great.

Sure is dry and windy outside. The grass is brown and crackly with large divets in the terrain. Reminds me of when our youngest son Jordan was about 6 and started a club called the "Alberticus" club. The goal was to look inside the cracks in the ground and see if any animals or insects lived in the cracks. He named the club after his grandfather Albert Tucker. Not sure if he had any members though.

A child's perspective is special and based partly on his size and partly on his experience. Living in the desert of New Mexico, I recall being a child of 5 and stepping out on our front porch one morning. In the corner of the porch, near the railing was a black furry creature. Intrigued but a little nervous, I went back inside, woke up Mom and Dad and told them a baby bear was on the porch. Now of course there were no baby bears in that part of New Mexico and besides a baby bear would be about the size of a 5 year old child. But in my perspective, the creature was black and furry making it a baby bear. And as we learned from Walt Disney, we were not supposed to play with baby bears since their mothers would be angry.

My parents looked at each other rather curiously and Dad headed out to the front porch. Glancing at the furry object, he grabbed a boot and disposed of the large black turantula! It was all rather adventurous to a 5 year old.

Reading "Is God a Christian" by R. Kirby Godsey and enjoying the ecumenical view of the author. Also reading through short stories by Reynolds Price, an outstanding writer whose personal approach is uncomfortably vulnerable and sensitive but also gentle. Still trying to get through the massive book by Ken Follett called "Fall of Giants." Strong writing but a little bit lacking in personal connection. "Passport to Peril" by Robert Parker (not of detective story fame) is an older spy novel setting in post WWII times. Kind of Graham Greene in style but very concise and entertaining. "The Alto Wore Tweed" is a Kindle download written by Mark Schweizer. Very fun, light detective reading with musical and religious allusions. Good for several smiles that's for sure. Still trying to finish another biography of Theodore Roosevelt. Should be done this week. Found another Robert Parker (different from the Passport Robert Parker) I hadn't read so jumped in and got through nearly half the book.

Had a bad day yesterday due partly to my own making. Started rough by not sleeping well and then running nearly 3 miles and felt terrible. Spent the rest of the day not making great decisions. I'll need to fix some problems next week. I guess not every day is a perfect day. Hopefully we learn from our mistakes. Life sure is humbling at times.

Liebestod, Beethoven, and Brahms

The incredible moment arrived and the grand 6-5 appogiatura captured my heart once again followed by the unnerving and relentlessly pulsating anticipations of the progressive melody in Liebestod. Suffering from what I have identified as analytical boredom from particular pieces of music, a malady that consists of hearing something, understanding it, and then no longer being interested in it, I have never grown tired of hearing Liebestod by Richard Wagner. It is one of and perhaps my favorite piece of music in all of music literature. Listening to the remarkable counterpoint of augmentation and diminution, thematic alteration, and expansive melodic lines is to hear the music within the music. Hearing it is to be transformed to another world, a sublimely perfect world made of everything beautiful and enchanting, a world of hope and peace and a world of perfect purity in all things. Every time I hear Liebestod, I experience an indescribable emotion that somehow alters and improves the inner being. A work of musical art unequaled and sitting on a throne of beauty.

Some of Beethoven affects me nearly as much and some of Brahms as well. I enjoy the music of Stevie Wonder, Elton John, and yes even Lady Gaga, in fact the list of music I enjoy seems to be nearly infinite, but the music of the masters goes beyond that of enjoyment and enters a different realm. And as I reflect on Liebestod, I wonder if I disagree with my earlier post on entertainment? Was I entertained by Liebestod? Am I entertained by Beethoven's Ninth Symphony or Brahms' First Symphony? Is there an emotional response that is deeper from listening to Wagner as related to listening to Sondheim or Michael Jackson? I think so. Does this mean that the music goes beyond that of entertainment? Maybe yes, maybe no.

Sure I was entertained, received pleasure from hearing Liebestod, but somehow it feels cheap to relegate the music into a classification of music for entertainment. Yet I suppose that no matter how it is expressed, how many ways I can describe the feeling, in spite of its longevity, its craftmanship, its sincerity and depth of emotions, in the end the music is still entertaining on some level. Hard to acknowledge this truth since the music has a greater depth of meaning to me well beyond that of most entertainment I see and experience around me.

The music of Wagner, Beethoven, Brahms is entertaining, but designating it as such is to diminish its power and significance. So please forgive my equivocation and pandering to the academic community, but I am having trouble attributing the magnificence of this music to fit into the concept of entertainment. On the other hand, to say it is not entertaining is to diminish its purpose. So all this to say that music can be and should be entertaining. Perhaps great music also reaches yet another level.

Music as Entertainment

Returning home from a week in Nashville where I learned about equalization, compression, recording techniques, eccentric people, and music curriculum, I have been reflecting on the power of the entertainment industry and how that relates to my world as a classically trained musician. Somehow I have resisted the idea that music is solely for the purpose of entertainment, that music has a power and a scope beyond and deeper than providing a good moment of happy feelings, of emotional cathartic release. As I learn and subsequently teach the craft of what music is and encourage the creative expression of music in all its forms, I have to wonder if I have missed something along the way. Maybe music is primarily entertainment.

And Nashville certainly is about entertainment. Music Row is filled with recording studios and publishers adorn various parts of the city. Clearing houses for artist protection are scattered about and many restaurants include a form of live music. The number of garage bands, combos, song writers, singers, and instrumentalists is staggering and the entire city seems to have music coming out of its pores. The guitar is nearly an icon and can be found with the turn of a head or an open ear. Nashville embraced the idea of music as entertainment and has thrived from its musical economy. Rejecting the idea of music as an art form apart from its entertainment value, Nashville has produced an untold number of recordings and live musicians. Maybe they are right.

After all, the great operas were written as entertainment, ways to occupy the royalty, to unify the peasants, to gather all in one room for one artistic event. Broadway musicals, often considered the opera of America, are essentially entertainment, a glorious integration of the arts to tell a story in music. Marching bands entertain the crowd at football games, jazz combos entertain people in night clubs, American Idol and Glee are all about entertainment. The guitar player on the street, the accordion player in the doorway, the singer grabbing a microphone, the whistler in the hallway, all these and more are providing some level of musical entertainment. Is it possible that an aural experience, apart from the visual is entertaining? Is all music entertainment? Maybe.

But what about music for worship? What about a priest chanting in a mode to communicate the parts of a mass? What about the acapella choir in Westminster Abbey or the organist playing the prelude? Are these a form of entertainment? Arguable certainly but nevertheless true in a way. Sure these musicians are worshiping, but they are also entertaining the people who are in turn worshiping. A fine line is drawn between enhancing the experiencing, providing background music, or serving the emotional content of the experience, but in the end, it is still a form of entertainment although difficult to admit!

Let's take a look at a symphony orchestra concert. Is this entertainment? A collective set of musicians who worked together for a common goal of a performance of one person's creative expression reside on a stage to give an audience aural pleasure, emotional release, and personal amusement. The event may not elicit great laughter or wild expressions of joy or extrinisic physical responses, but it does satisfy something within the human spirit that is pleasurable. The concert may not have been a visual mosaic of colors or a smorgasbord of clever verbal quips or include dancing or theatre, but nevertheless the concert was a form of entertainment. Its depth of sound, preparation of the performers, formality of the environment, profound acceptance of great art, or historical acknowledgement of the literature, do not take the concert out of its intent--to entertain the audience.

And entertainment can be delivered to large a populous or to smaller units. Humming to oneself is solitary entertainment, a worthy goal in all respects. Taken on a broader scale, collective music making serves not just the performers but the listeners as well, causing a sense of pleasure in all constituencies involved. No matter what the level or sincerity of the music making, regardless of the setting or the intention, it remains a form of entertainment. We tend to view entertainment as requiring dancing or clowns or comedians or rock bands, but an expansion of the concept takes us down the road to include performance with its array of opportunities.

Musicians, trained or untrained, need to accept their role as delivering entertainment to other people. We trained musicians somehow prefer to think we are providing music at a deeper level than sheer entertainment, that we are delivering something more intentional, purposeful, and life-altering to the human spirit, but in the final analysis, music, regardless of its form, style, genre, quantity, or even quality, is ultimately about entertainment. Once we accept this outcome, we can begin to accept the many kinds of music that make up our culture and our world. An individual may prefer a quieter, contemplative form of music and may prefer music of a particular genre or time period, or may prefer a certain kind of instrumentation or text, or may prefer art music with its ability to reach an emotional depth not always found in other music, but regardless of the preference, music is pleasurable on many levels to millions of people. It may be true, and I subscribe to this conclusion as well, that quality music making begats quality listening experiences, and that greater preparation and greater craft of musicianship result in deeper pleasure for the listener, and trained musicians certainly seek to reach a profound level of expression, but the strategic goal remains that of entertainment.

This does not in any sense abdicate or even subjugate the need for quality musical experiences, and in fact it further demonstrates the value of training musicians to seek out profound forms of entertainment and emotional expression. But it does in a sense remind us in academia to be sensitive to the variety of preferences of music and never to disregard listener response to music. Without an audience, music resides in a vacuum, a vortex with no purpose and guaranteed to disappear into oblivion.

Traveling to Nashville

Left the house at 3:30 on Sunday for a 1 1/2 hour drive to Abilene to fly to DFW and onward to Nashville with the goal of arriving in Nashville around 10 p.m. But several problems and planes later we arrived in Nashville the next day at 4:30 in our same clothes in which we began our journey. We left Abilene the first time but were not allowed to land due to weather so we returned to Abilene to wait for things to calm down. Waiting until 10, we left again for DFW and arrived safely but without a way to continue to Nashville. Staying in a motel for the night without our luggage, we got up early and fly to Memphis where we waited for several hours for the flight to Nashville.

Arriving in Nashville and having great concern about our luggage, we walked to the baggage office and there they were--our suitcases. Renting a car we headed to our conference and arrived successfully. Now we are at a conference that may or may not provide information that is useful to my profession. We shall see.

Nashville is beautiful with rolling green hills, tall full trees, and luscious flowers adorning the landscape. Warm outside and more humid than makes me comfortable, I am happy to be here experiencing a different part of the country. It is a musical world with strong emphases on country music and popular music, demonstrating once again the proliferation of music in our culture. All types of music are heard in Nashville including opera, ballet, and symphonic music not to mention the myriad of pop styles from bluegrass to fusion to jazz.

Cicadas are out of control in this fair city. Piercing, painful cacophony of sound pervades the environment everywhere we go, providing its own kind of natural beauty that although harsh is also ironically natural. As we learn about equalization, compression, and sequencing, it is strangely comforting to know that the insects equalize their world without the use of electronics. I wonder if the sounds of nature are somehow more prevalent in Nashville, driving the need for music and thereby lifting Nashville to its place as a musical mecca. I guess there is no way to know. Curious thought.

Fun place for sure and a great place to visit and probably a great place to live.

Learning to play an instrument

The sound was painful to the ear, loud and obnoxious, accompanied by uncomfortable giggles of both fear and amazement as the student nervously with a degree of anxiety blended with joy returned the instrument back to the teacher. "Will I really get to play an instrument?" lurked inside each head, the secret longing to express emotions through music hoping to be unleashed in the form of band. Parents looked on wondering about the sound itself, the costs associated with band, the commitment, and also the ability of their child. Yet there was no denying the shimmering energy that abounded within their son or daughter when she held the instrument and made that sound. Pure joy alighted on her face as she imagined herself marching on the field making music.

Complete trust and faith in the teachers to help make the decision over which instrument was best occurred when the students and parents approached the band director wondering what would happen next. Assessing the child including his teeth, lips, general aptitude, musical aptitude, potential size, and mostly desire, the director educates them on what would be the best instrument. Sometimes the director misses the mark and places a student on the wrong instrument. Time usually reveals this problem and the wise director will encourage a change early enough to allow the student success. Meanwhile, the student anxiously awaits the moment he can hold the instrument and play a melody.

The process is a shade laborious at first, learning to hold the instrument correctly, learning how to care for it, finding what makes it tick, adjusting your body to fit the instrument, applying what you see on the written page to the actual instrument. Attempting to make the darn thing sound good, pleasing to the ear, matching the music, doing the rhythm correctly, making your fingers accurate, hoping for success. It is an emotional experience in all respects. In some ways similar to hitting the ball when it crosses the plate or getting the math problem right or asking someone on a date, it is all frightening and wildly vulnerable.

But wow--it is worth the anxiety! The feeling deep inside that comes rushing out as you learn to play an instrument is overwhelmingly joyous and fulfilling. Everything right that exists inside the heart and soul is outwardly expressed through the strange object being held in your hand. The neurons come alive and your body energy becomes a rushing river of rapids gliding effortlessly and unbridled toward the goal of music. That first sound and later that first melody is one of those experiences to be treasured and remembered forever.

To the students thinking about playing: your parents and your grandparents will love every sound you make and every attempt at music that you experience. Let not your fear and anxiety inhibit your desire for music. Music is for everyone.

There is a marvelous song by Elton John called Electricity. It is a song that a boy sings describing the feeling he gets when he starts dancing. The song is from the amazingly inspiring musical called Billy Elliot. The words and music describe the same feeling one gets when playing an instrument, which is all about the personal expression of music.

Savant Gifts in Autism

Having written several times on the myth of latent gifts and unusual abilities associated with autism, and working to alleviate the fallacies of thinking that many people have toward autism, I now find myself taking the other position. While it is true that movies such as Rain Man and Mercury Rising demonstrate the amazing prowess of certain autistic people, it would be wise to remember that those rare people are exceptional. It is anecdotally rewarding to imagine the "trapped" genius residing within a shell of autism that if given the right environmental circumstances can contribute intellectually to modern culture, but the reality dictates that most autistic children and adults are of average intelligence and aptitude, similar to the averages of normal people. It makes sense that there are and always will be the exceptions on both ends of the intelligence spectrum to include brilliant and gifted autistics as well as those with significant learning challenges.

If the outside world expects a high level of savant intelligence in some specialized area, then disappointment will usually be the result. I have known blind people who often felt the expectation of musical gifts to be a frustration since they may or may not have the same kind of musical abilities we hear about in the media. Stevie Wonder and Ken Medema are exceptions to the rule and it is grossly unfair to make them the standard for all sight-challenged people. The same is true in autism. Rain Man was exceptional and to impose that kind of expectation on all autistic people is to set them up for failure and disappointment.

Autism is a neurological disorder that can have related issues with cognition or in many cases simply communication. Much has been written on the characteristics of autism so there is no need to dwell on previous knowledge. What I do want to mention is that in spite of my belief in the generally average gifts of most autistic children, there are indeed often latent abilities that manifest themselves in the behavior and practice of autistic adults. Because of the nature of autism being more concrete and less abstract, order and systemization are necessary for their success. In some ways, this is oddly instinctual in the manner that forces us to respond to our environment out of survival. Although non-autistics develop a kind of social contract to "fit in" to the world around them, an autistic must find other means. One of the ways this happens is to compartmentalize different events and knowledge. They work hard to give a sense of order to everything they encounter. This helps them cope and understand the complex world around them.

Joel has an unusual ability to hear numbers, see them in his head, and recall them back with great accuracy. He also does this with books at the library, placing books in the correct order based on their originally correct location. Over time, he has no need to read the call number, he simply knows where the book belongs and takes it to its spot. He tells me that he knows where every book belongs and has never made a mistake in placing a book on the shelf.

For most of us, we are slowly losing the ability to recall phone numbers. Our tendency to place all numbers in a phone directory on our cell phones is likely subverting the need to recall the numbers. It is not unusual for us to falter when asked the numbers of people we contact everyday. There is no need to memorize the number as long it is one click away on the phone. For Joel, however, he does not place numbers in his directory. Instead he memorizes the numbers and recalls them in his head. My suspicion is that he visualizes the precise order of the number and associates that order with a particular person. It is an unusual ability and one that makes us pause as we realize very few of us have that ability. Yet in spite of that remarkable skill, Joel does not have great short-term memory for other things. If something cannot be ordered, he cannot recall it in his mind.

There is little doubt that autism remains a mystery to most people, perhaps everyone at least to an extent. Yet the more we understand, the better we can help autistics adjust to the complex world. Part of our job as guardians of our adult son is to show him ways to use his abilities and his disabilities that will help him be successful. But part of our job is also to educate the world on ways to help and understand him. At times this is a full-time job!